Nathan Fake - You Are Here (FortDax Remix)

Generally if I'm writing I have to do it in silence. If I put some music on and it's any good then I won't be able to concentrate on what I'm saying, because my attention is all too easily stolen by a good tune. And if the music is rubbish, then, well, why would I bother listening to it in the first place?

Here though, is one of very few exceptions.



Brooker-tastic.

Women! Wordplay! Scissors!

Yep, if I ever get around to writing a play one day, the whole thing will be premised on this one image.

Seven Lessons of the Stag

In the summer of last year I went on my first proper lads' stag weekend. For some reason I wrote but never got around to posting the following list of lessons I learnt from that debaunched weekend in Nottingham.

Lesson One
Indoor golf is no more fun than outdoor golf.

Lesson Two
Black Jack is not a game of skill.

Lesson Three
Getting 60% accuracy against clay pigeons while armed with a 12-gauge shotgun makes you feel 60% more manly.

Lesson Four
Lapdances are almost worth the asking price.

Lesson Five
A gang of 16 guys have zero chance of getting into a club at 2am.

Lesson Six
You can always find one scummy over-crowded bar that will serve anyone 'til 4am.

Lesson Seven
There's less cruelty involved in the making of a beef burger than a chicken burger.